Lucky

We're really lucky. On so many levels, so very lucky. I am reminded of that when something like the ruling on Proposition 8 comes down as it did yesterday. Rob and I had the right to marry if we wanted to, or the right to not if we had chosen not to. We will be recognized by society and the law as mother and father to this child, and we did not have to use extraordinary measures to conceive this child. We can give the baby either of our names or some combination of them, both of our names can go on the birth certificate, and we are both its parents without having to pay tens of thousands in legal fees for some judge to declare that so. We won't have to carry guardianship papers if we travel, and though we will take legal measures to make sure our child is protected in case of either of our unexpected death or disability, we do not have to do this to make sure our child will stay out of foster care. We can add the child to either of our health insurance policies if we choose,
I try to never take any of this for granted. I have witnessed the difficulties that very good people around me have had in planning and conceiving their children, the money and energy and emotion expended in working towards what came easy to us is staggering and humbling. The additional resources some of them will have to expend to gain the same legal rights is downright unjust. Some will go without those rights due to cost and just hope that either thing change soon or that they never encounter situations that would challenge those rights. Things may change soon, we're seeing progress at a rate that no one predicted but is it really fast enough?

In the meantime, no matter how much my ribs hurt or how much time we spend worrying about money and daycare and taking care of a newborn, I have to remember how very lucky we are. We did nothing to deserve what we have, so luck is really the only word to describe it.